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Let’s talk about SEX
Feb 09

Let’s talk about SEX

*This post contains adult content. Please read with your own discretion. 

Since it’s getting closer to Valentine’s Day… let’s talk about SEX! You game? I mean heck, we are all grown here right? Some couples are romantic all year round, while others tend to lose their mojo and don’t think about gaining it back until game day (V-day). Let’s be honest. Folks get into relationships, and stop doing the things that hooked the person they are in a relationship with. That’s mistake number one. You would think that most of what I’m going to talk about below are no-brainers, but believe me… I hear what women talk about at the nail shop and the beauty salon, and I also hear my guy friends complaining about things as well. So apparently there are some gaps in sexual pleasure that need to be discussed and here are a few thought provoking ideas to getting your mojo back and get you revved up for the big day.


Hopefully for most of you women, hygiene is a not an issue. Smell good, make sure your skin is soft, etc. etc. Oh and men the same goes for you. If you walk up to your woman, trying to get all close while smelling like a buffalo… you better believe she is not concentrating on the kisses you are applying to her neck but instead she is concentrating on how much longer she can hold her breath while enduring the funk. ICK!


Like chivalry, foreplay is not dead. I’m gonna go ahead and put it out there. Men love blow jobs! And not a prissy scared to touch it, blow job, but a sloppy, slobbery, like you are eating the best meal you have had in ages BLOW JOB!! Yes just like that. Oh and fellas, you are not off the hook either when it comes to foreplay. I hear so many women talk about how guys are so anxious to get to the climax that they forget all about the fun kickoff. FYI – we like oral sex, we like to be fondled just like you. Oh, but speaking of being fondled, please respect the clit. PLEEZ! Ya’ll can be so rough sometimes. STOP the roughness and for heaven’s sake, stop tapping and tickling the clit. Just softly take 1 to 2 fingers and rub it from side to side, while kissing an ear or neck. This is where your multi-tasking skills will come into play.


Some men and women get stuck in a rut. They use the same positions, do it the same time of day or night, all the time. It’s like being stuck in the matrix or a mirror maze or living the same day over and over again. BOOOOOOORRRRRIIIINNNGGGGG!! If this explains your sexual relationship, I encourage you to get creative, try something different. Introduce a toy that you both can enjoy, heck go to the toy shop together and pick something cool out. You can also try ROLE PLAYING. This is my absolute favorite. You don’t have to be that boring person who is dating another boring person who both want to tell each other what you want in bed but scared to do so. You can be the chick that takes control and slaps her man and tells her what he better do, or he is going to GET IT! Men you can be that guy that your lady is stuck in an elevator with and the last thing on your mind is BEING STUCK IN THAT ELEVATOR if you know what I mean. I remember one time, I tied myself, ‘this was difficult’ but somehow I managed to tie my hands and feet to the bed posts and gag myself. When hubby came in I was screaming help, help, help as if I were in a dungeon and someone else had tied me up and were coming back to kill me. So, he was like my knight in shining armor, I won’t tell you the rest but you get my drift right? Go have sex in the car like you did when you were dating. Pleeeez, don’t act like you haven’t done that before. Switch it up!


This goes for men and women. If you are always the one that’s just lying there as you are on some sort of boring roller coaster ride, then I encourage you to take charge. It’s ok to be submissive in bed sometimes but other times women want a man that’s going to grab us, demand that we take our clothes off and get busy. Ladies vice versa, sometimes men want a woman to just walk up to them, drop to her knees and handle business. ‘Oh my gosh really, what do I say’ uhhhhhh you don’t say anything; this is not a verbal conversation. Step out of that shell and grab the bull by the horns.


Everyone loves a hot and steamy romantic love making session every now and then, but sometimes they don’t want to make love. There might be some rough play involved, a little choking, a little slapping here or there, a little hair pulling, WHO’S IS IT, WHO’S IS IT? …….…wooooooo I’m sorry, let me gain my composure 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Ok, I’m back. Sorry about that, I got a little wrapped up in thought, but uh yeah, if this happens to you, don’t be scurrrrrrrd, just enjoy the ride, and don’t be scared to be the one shaking the room either. Men, us women aren’t as delicate as you think.

Oh and hey, don’t just do these things for Valentine’s Day, but incorporate them into your love life. Sex is a huge part of a relationship and I am a firm believer that you have to keep things spicy or at least interesting in order to keep everyone happy.

Happy Lovin’ ya’ll

Ms. Jay #SkincareStarlet

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